Sunday, July 11, 2010

Onward and Upward!

Please join me over at my new blog, Fine and Fair, where I write to my daughter Delilah about all of the little memories we are making!

Sunday, October 25, 2009

Officially Full Term!

Despite my good intentions, I have apparently become a once-a-month blogger. I truly do intend to post more often, time is simply flying by this final trimester (a rarity, from what I hear from other mothers-to-be who say that time drags on at barely a crawl!).

Last weekend was the baby shower, at which the babe was given many lovely gifts on which to unleash a variety of icky baby body fluids. The following day, I went out and picked up the remaining "must have" items, since clever marketing departments will have you believe that you need more than boobs and a safe sleeping space in order to keep a baby alive. Plus, y'know, CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUTE!!!!!!

So as far as we know, our house is pretty much as ready as it's going to be for her arrival. I haven't scrubbed the door handles or light switches yet, but it'll be a day or two before she can reach those anyway, right?

As of yesterday, my baby girl is considered to be officially, medically "full term", which is a fancy way of saying it will most likely be a few weeks before she's born, but if she were born now, she would no longer be considered "premature".

In other news, my stubborn little girl is hanging out quite comfortably in a breech position, despite my efforts to turn her. I've been doing everything under the sun that is supposed to get breech babies to turn (note to self: google whether it safe to do handstands while pregnant) and she's not budging.

I have faith that if it is safe for her to do so, she will turn before she makes her debut. This is my preference, as I'd much prefer to give birth the old fashioned way as opposed to having her surgically removed if she doesn't turn. If it is not safe for her to turn, and turn she does not, then said surgical removal shall be her fate, as my health care provider of choice's policy is to deliver all breech babies via caesarean, and an unassisted home birth of a breech baby is just not something I'm prepared to take on for my first child.

Fingers crossed for a flip!

Sunday, September 27, 2009

It's aliiiive!

I'm not dead and I have neither abandoned nor forgot about my blog. I've simply been very, very busy and attempting to be responsible with my priorities.

The main source of busy-ness has been that BD and I got hitched! After being engaged for 15 months, all of a sudden the wedding was like, a month away, and then it was like, a week away, and then it was like, tomorrow, and now it was like, a week ago!

It was a beautifully perfect, lovely day. Everything fell right into place, and we are so grateful to all of our friends who pitched in to make sure everything was marvelous for us. We are surrounded by a remarkable, generous, loving, supportive group of close friends and family, and I've been using the word "blessed" a lot in reference to this.

In other busy news, I'm getting back into the swing of school, and am doing my best to work ahead and do extra projects since I'll be, y'know, giving birth at some point in the semester. My teachers are extremely understanding and confident in my ability to keep up with my work. One of them even mentioned that she would "look the other way" were a baby to attend her class. When I mentioned that I would be breastfeeding, and that the wee one would likely have to eat at some point during the 3 hour long class, she said that I could go into one of the video labs to take care of business and she'd hang a "Beware of Boobs" sign on the door. Ah, the benefits of attending (and paying out the ass for) a small, private college.

In pregnancy news, it seems like I'm going to the doctor a lot these days. Everything is going along rather un-remarkably, which is a good things in terms of my plans for a drug and intervention free water birth.

The hormones have been a-ragin' as was quite evident in an episode that occured yesterday. This weekend kicked off Oktoberfest, a very well-known festival in MyTown in which we celebrate German traditions and heritage (by which I mean, the entire town gets disgustingly intoxicated for a week straight). BD was giving me a hard time when I was complaining about how obnoxious and gross all the drunk people are, since, were I not with child, I'd be out-obnoxious-ing and out-grossing the best of them.

ANYWAY, I was watching the big kick-off parade on television, and as one of the local marching bands went by on the screen, I started blubbering uncontrollably and COULD NOT STOP. Why, you ask? Because I found myself wondering if in another 15 years, our precious little sunshine will be marching in the parade, and we will be among the proud parents watching her march by with a camera in one hand and a beer in the other. Then I got to wondering what intstrument she might play, or will she be a baton twirler? Cheerleader? (BD was adamant that she will NOT be a cheerleader, but whose to say?)

I was seriously all choked up and in tears for like, 20 minutes. Thank you, hormones.

We have no more classes to attend (thank goodness) and cannot believe that we will most likely be bringing a tiny human being into the world at some point in the next 5-9 weeks. That's only 5 to 9 of the period of time that has lapsed since our wedding last weekend, which was barely more than the blink of an eye. I get to meet my little girl in 5-9 blinks!

Friday, August 28, 2009

Featured Friday: Baby-be-Mine Organic Bamboo Belly Band

One of the first items I ordered when I found out I was pregnant was the Organic Bamboo Belly Band from Baby-be-Mine. (I ordered it through Amazon.)

I cannot say enough good things about this product. At first, I used it to cover the fact that my jeans were un-buttoned, back when I could still get my pre-pregnancy jeans up over my hips. Now into the third trimester, I'm still using it! Now I use it to cover the not-so-lovely panel that maternity jeans are known for, when my shirt isn't quite long enough to cover it. It simply looks like I'm wearing a snug tank top or tube top underneath whatever I'm wearing.

I ordered 4 of these, one each in black, white, cocoa, and stone. The bamboo fabric is delightfully soft and easy to care for, requiring no special laundering. I've heard women complain of other types of belly bands being too short, or not staying up, but I've had no such problems with these.

After my daughter is born, I will continue to use them until I can button my old jeans again, and will also use them so that if I need to lift up my shirt to nurse, my saggy and stretch-marked post-baby belly and sides will be covered! And beyond that, hell, I'll probably just use them as regular ol' tube tops!

Thursday, August 13, 2009

Blinded by the White

The baby's room is all painted! Our friend (with BD's help) did an awesome job (and spent lots of hours) fixing and patching and sanding and priming and painting the walls. The walls are yellow (exactly the yellow I was picturing in my mind, which like, NEVER happens with me and paint), and the trim is orange. VERY ORANGE. In a good way, though. It was rather overwhelming before the walls were yellow and the furniture was back in place, but now? AWESOME. I love that it's not overly girly, but super cute.

My mom had offered to get us wood blinds for the baby's room, so we ordered some white bamboo ones on Sunday, and they arrived today. Unfortunately, since nothing else in the room is white (the furniture is all dark wood) they look horribly out of place.

So, BD is off to see if he can exchange them for a darker wood variety. Let it be known that he wanted darker wood ones in the first place, and I said that no, we needed to get white ones, because it needs to be a bright and sunshiney room for our little sunshine (gag, I know) and the dark wood will make it gloomy!

Alas, A MAN WAS RIGHT. Mark your calendars, folks. ;p

Friday, August 7, 2009

Featured Friday: The Snoogle

The Snoogle by Leachco is not your average body pillow.

Having a Snoogle in your bed with you is like spooning someone and being spooned simultaneously (assuming you have a human spooning partner in your bed as well...otherwise, order two) but without that tricky arm conundrum, at least on the Snoogle side. In other words? Heaven.

Unlike regular body pillows, which are essentially just big pillows, the Snoogle's unique shape truly does provide the right kind of support right where the pregnant body needs it. It can be difficult to find comfortable sleeping positions with a big ol' baby belly, and this nifty pillow does the trick.

The photo above shows just a few of the super-comfy positions possible with The Snoogle. It can also be sort of swirled into a spiral for a comfy butt-nest for movie watching on the couch or reading in bed. It comes with an insert that shows all sorts of positions and uses for them, including using it for breastfeeding support after the babe arrives.

I recommend buying an extra cover for it, since the covers are much easier to wash than the pillow itself. I have two covers on mine.

Based on the way BD snuggles into it once I get out of bed, it is also cozy for non-pregnant people, including men!

I have only one complaint about The Snoogle, and it is more a complaint about the mobility issues that develop later in pregnancy. With BD on one side of me, and The Snoogle on the other, getting out of bed to pee 26 times per night is a bit more of a challenge. Hurling my pregnant body over this glorious pillow is a bit of work, but well worth it.

I give it 4 out 5 stars. ****

Because I just randomly decided to give out stars. I'll have to devise some sort of system of what the number of stars actually means to me. :x

Thursday, August 6, 2009

Featured Fridays (unless I come up with a more clever title before tomorrow)

I've decided to do "something new" with my little piece of the web. Yes, in addition to posting on it more often. :x

On Fridays, I will feature a product or service that I love. Many of them may be related to pregnancy, or birth, or babies, and what-have-you, many of them likely will not be. Don't be surprised to see "Featured Friday: Chocolate Ice Cream with Sliced up Bananas and Chocolate Sauce", because seriously, who can live without THAT?!?

Also, I'm going to apologize in advance for the times when I will inevitably forget to post a Featured Friday post. I promise I have the best of intentions, though.

Wouldn't it be cool if I could get people to pay me to feature their products? Any leads on how to like, do that?

I Think I Might be a Boob Nazi

Every now and again, something happens that reminds me that I'm TOTALLY pregnant. Like this morning, when I was watching The View (shut up. I don't know how I came to start watching The View. All I know is that lately, if it becomes 10:00, and the television is not turned to The View, something in my universe feels terribly off-kilter. BD doesn't understand why I watch it, since it normally just pisses me off.)

Whew. So yeah, I was watching The View, and realized that my pregnancy hormones must be raging out of control, because I am crying. Tears of JOY. At a montage of the most memorable moments of the season, or some such, which culminates in a clip of the cast of The View intermingled with what is apparently the current Broadway cast of Hair, singing Let The Sunshine In all together, and Barbara Walters flashes a peace sign, and I melt into a heap of joyful sobs. Because clearly, this means, THERE WILL BE WORLD PEACE.

But anyway, the whole point of me typing in this box on the internet is what happend before that, which was one of those times when watching The View really pissed me off and made me want to kill Elizabeth Hasselbeck in a slow and painfully torturous way. Usually it's the political nonsense she spouts off that makes me feel homicidal, but today, it was her comments about breastfeeding.

When she first started talking about the dream she had in which she was breastfeeding her new baby, and then her two current kidlets were also nursing, I was optimistic, thinking she was going to proclaim the joys of extended breastfeeding or tandem nursing.

But no. She goes on to say that she thinks it's wrong to breastfeed a child who is old enough to ask for milk.

Um. What?

Lots of women (I intend to be one of them) teach their babies to sign "milk" before they are able to speak. So, babies can ask for milk before they can say "Hey mom, can you whip out your tit please?" Then there's that whole thing about hunger cues, so, essentially, they can "ask for milk" from, you know, BIRTH.

But anyway (I promise to spare you a rundown of the benefits of breastmilk, so bare with me), the World Health Organization recommends exclusively breastfeeding for the first 6 months of life, and continuing to breastfeed in conjunction with introducing solids for 2 years and beyond. I'm pretty sure most two year olds know how to ask for milk.

In other words, don't be surprised if, say a year and a half from now, you see me out with my daughter somewhere, and she says "Hey mom, can you whip out your tit?" and I say "Sure honey" and proceed to whip out my tit.

Saturday, August 1, 2009

But wait! There's more!

We actually did learn a useful thing or two at the Childbirth Preparation class yesterday.

Perhaps most importantly, we learned what the code word is for "GET THESE PEOPLE OUT OF MY ROOM RIGHT NOW". And no, I won't tell you what the code word is, because what if you end up to be "these people"? Then wouldn't it be embarassing for everyone involved if I revealed here that the code word is, say "Graham Crackers", and then you're in my room while my boobs are soaking my hospital gown and I call the nurse's station and say "Hey, I need some graham crackers like whoah!"

Mmmmmm.......graham crackers......

Oh, sorry.

So the other thing is that since ALL of the regular labor and delivery rooms were occupied during the class, the tour took us, instead, to the Birth Center Suite. Which, um, WE WANT. One of the hospitals two birthing tubs (we're hoping for a waterbirth) is in this room. (The other is between two of the regular L & D rooms.) The cool thing (well, one of many) about the Birth Center Suite is that once there, you're there for the duration. It has all the comforts of the post partum rooms, and the accessibility to everything necessary for a non-medicalized birth all right in the same place (they even use simpy a doppler for occassional fetal monitoring, rather than strapping stuff to you or screwing electrodes into your babies head!). This means, of course, that you can't use the Birth Center Suite if you're planning an induction, or an epidural, or any other slew of medical interventions. (Signal sad looks and sighs from everyone else in the class, while BD and I look at each other and give each other a telepathic high five, because we know we won't have to contend with any of them for availability of the room!)

It also has a separate room with a couch and chairs (and maybe even a single bed?) so there is more room for visitors, and just, you know, a spot for you to go other than the queen size bed facing the birth tub, which I'll totally use for baths post-partum, too, assuming they'll let me.

The only other requirement for using this room (it doesn't even cost more!!) is that you've had a complication free pregnancy and no known risks such as Gestational Diabetes, Pre-eclampsia, etc., etc., etc.

So, here's hoping that our pregnancy remains low-risk and complication free, and that no one else beats us to the Birth Center Suite (WHY DO THEY ONLY HAVE ONE?!?!?) on the day of our big event.

Friday, July 31, 2009

Classy Lady

So we've begun the slew of birth/baby related classes that we signed up for. We have learned a thing or two (maybe three things?) that we didn't already know. We've taken the "Happiest Baby on the Block" class (learned how to properly swaddle, became alarmed at the volume of "SSSSSHHHHHH"ing required to calm a crying baby), the Breastfeeding class (didn't learn a whole lot new there, but did get to see what a "good latch" looks like, which is helpful) and today was the "Childbirth Preparedness Class" (which could have easily been titled "Childbirth Preparedness for those who trust the medical establishment more than their own bodies"....also, they could have just done the epidural part first and then everyone in the class except for us could have left, since it seemed to be the main thing the other ladies were concerned about).

Anyway, the main thing we learned today is that I am actually a 14 year old boy.

I did a really, really good job of keeping my mouth shut about cascades of interventions and how our bodies are made to do this and don't require drugs from the moment we go into labor, because obviously these ladies were only interested in "HOW SOON CAN I HAVE THE EPIDURAL? CAN I GET IT TODAY???". For some reason, though, when we got to the part where we laid down on our mats with our pillows for relaxation exercises, I couldn't hold my laughter in. Here we are, at pretty much the only "natural" part of the entire day, and I'm trying so hard not to laugh at the lady's voice on the CD with the cheesy music in the background, telling me to imagine I'm "resting by the oceanside, or, you know, something that's relaxing for you", that I am shaking. And the sight of my belly shaking so hard is making BD hold in laughter, which makes it even worse, until the point where I let out a laugh and simultaneously fart.

Yes, that's right. *I* was the one who farted during the relaxation techniques, and then I pretty much totally lost it.

I had to turn my head away from BD for the remainder of the relaxation portion, because even the slightest glimpse of him out of the corner of my eye was enough to put me into laughing hyena mode. I was so focused on NOT LAUGHING that I paid very little attention to cheesy relaxation CD lady until I tuned into her saying "You've just completed a 70 second contraction!" and I turned to BD and said "Wow, that was really easy!" and lost it all over again.

Friday, June 19, 2009

It's a Girl!

We had a doctor's appointment on Tuesday that went delightfully well. My blood pressure is still great, my weight gain is on track, and all is well in pregnancy land. The doctor told us we could have our routine 2nd trimester ultrasound (a.k.a. Anatomy Scan) anytime; so when we were told that the next available ultrasound appointment was the very next day (Wednesday) we took it!

On the way to the ultrasound BD and I had a little talk with the babe, saying that it's okay to show your bits to mommy and daddy and medical professionals, so don't be afraid to show them off today, just don't show them to strangers.

Well, apparently she understood, because she spent most of the ultrasound with her ankles over her head, showing off that she is, indeed, a girl. Several times she turned to flash her girly bits while the songrapher was trying to get other views! That's my girl! :)

The ultrasound was such a powerful, amazing experience. BD and I were completely in awe, holding each other's hands tighter than ever, watching our precious little baby up on the screen. Getting to see her move around a bit (so cute when she got startled by the ultrasound wand!) was the coolest. When the ultrasound started, she had her hand in front of her face. It was like she was checking it out, like "what the heck is this thing?", then she waved it around a bit.

When the sonographer got the money shot and started typing "IT'S A GIRL" on the screen (we had told her beforehand that we wanted to find out), we both just lost it and started blubbering all over the place. Of course, I would be thrilled to pieces with either gender, since I think BD and I would raise the kind of young man this world needs more of, but I've always, always, always wanted a daughter. BD is over the moon too, and looking forward to having a daddy's girl dancing around on top of his feet. :)

As we walked out from the appointment, I asked BD what he was thinking, and he responded "If it were a boy, I'd only have one dick to worry about. Now I've gotta worry about all the dicks in the world!" I said "Well.....maybe she'll be gay!" to which he responded "She better be!". Yes, that's right folks, it doesn't take gay parents to raise gay children. Just over-protective dads and open-minded moms. ;) (I kid, of course; our daughter has our blessing to love whomever she deems fit, male or female.)

Our daughter. My, that has a beautiful ring to it.

Sunday, June 7, 2009

Mama Stretch Pants

Things are still going along rather uneventfully with my pregnancy. I first felt movement about 2 weeks ago (May 23rd). Nothing too powerful thus far, and yet stronger than the bubbly, fluttery feeling I've heard about. It feels like a teeny little person tapping on me from the inside. :)

My mom ordered us the crib and dresser we liked, and BD got them both put together within two days, all by himself! He wouldn't even let me help him. He was a man on a mission! There was obviously no rush to get it done, but having the crib and dresser (and the pile of clothes and other baby things we're slowly acquiring) is really making the 2nd bedroom feel like "the baby's room".

Speaking of BD, earlier tonight when I had my back to him, my shirt had creeped up a little bit, and he started laughing and said "Nice mama stretch pants!" about my maternity jeans. I turned around him and shot him a look of death (y'know, practicing the "mom look") and he quickly said "You're hot baby!"

Smart man.

Saturday, May 16, 2009

I hope I'm not as neglectful of my child as I've been of this blog!

Wow, it's been almost 2 months since I posted!

To be honest, the remainder of my first trimester was rather uneventful. I gained a little weight, and that's about it! I was blessed to escape the horrors of morning/night/all-day sickness. I took lots of naps. I behaved myself.


Now that I'm in the second trimester, it seems a little more real and less scary.

On May 6th, we heard our little nugget's heartbeat for the first time. It was an incredible experience, so much so that I can hardly describe it. I, of course, burst out laughing when the Dr. found the heartbeat; my laughter sounded really loud and crazy on the doppler, which made me laugh even harder, and then he had to start all over again to find the heartbeat! I managed to keep it together for long enough for him to get the rate: 150 bpm. A strong and solid heartbeat indeed. BD had tears in eyes. He is so precious. :)

Later that night, BD told me how proud he was of me and what a good job I was doing growing our little babe. He is so sweet and supportive; I'm a lucky broad! Last night he told me I was glowing. I asked if he meant that I looked sweaty, and he said "No, you look really beautiful." He then proceeded to marvel at how shallow my belly button is already becoming, and how he can't fit his finger in it very deep at all anymore.

Yesterday, I switched from my standard navel jewelry to my pregnancy piercing: I had a dream the night before that my navel ring hole tore open, and it was super grody. So, I made the switch.

I started a paper journal to write to baby, all the sappy, mushy, gooshy things I'm thinking. We've been working on names, and OH how people love to give feedback on the names we've chosen! Most of the feedback has been positive, quite honestly, which is nice. :) We cannot WAIT to find out what our little nugget has between his/her legs. It's getting exhausting referring to him/her as him/her, it, our little nugget, cletus the fetus, the baby and so on.

This is a very boring update. See, this is why I haven't bothered. :p

Thursday, March 19, 2009

Is it my heightened sense of smell, or do I stink?

Duuuuuude. I'm having major smell issues. As in, I stink! All I can smell is my own BO. I'm sweating like crazy and I feel like I totally wreak. Yesterday in the shower, I washed my armpits 4 times. I sniffed them after each wash and they STILL smelled. I was SO embarrassed in class last night, because I was sure everyone in the room could smell me. When I got home, I made BD sniff me, and he insisted that I was only a little bit stinky, and that he didn't notice it until he stuck his face in my armpit. I guess that's good, but it doesn't change the fact that I am driving myself nuts with the way I smell. Yuck.

Tuesday, March 17, 2009

Grandparents Galore

This baby is going to have 8 Grandparents. Can we say spoiled?

We went out to my mom's house last night to share the news, and she was beside herself with excitement. It was such a relief to see how overjoyed she was, and just feel her love and support. My normally stoic step-dad even cracked a smile and hugged and congratulated us. My little brother kept his cool, like any 12 year old would, but I can sense he's pretty jazzed about being an uncle.

BD delivered the news to his mom and step-dad, and dad and step-mom, over the phone when we got home. Both sets of parents seemed very excited and happy for us. His mom and step-dad starting asking questions about logistics that we don't have answers for yet, but overall seemed genuinely happy and excited. I could hear his dad and step-mom hootin' and hollerin' and jumping up and down through the phone from across the room! They were definitely excited, and his step-mom called me "little mama", and his dad told me to take good care of myself, and told BD to take good care of me too. :)

I called my sister, too, to let her know that she's going to be an aunt, and she is ready to let the baby shopping begin! I would have preferred to tell her in person, but I was afraid I wouldn't get a chance to see her before she leaves on vacation later this week.

It feels good to have our family in our corner, and now we're beginning the task of sharing the news with our friends. What a whirlwind!

Two positives do indeed make a positive

Oh boy! (Or girl!)

The blood test yesterday confirmed what the two home pregnancy tests told us. We're havin' a baby! We have an appointment with a nurse at the end of March that will be mostly informational, and an appointment with a doctor the first week in May, at which we should be able to hear our lil' nugget's heartbeat.

Monday, March 16, 2009

Sesame Seeds & Raisins (No, this is not about food cravings!)

Depending on which source I believe, my baby is currently either the size of a sesame seed, or the size of a raisin. Aren't sesame seeds those tiny little seeds they put on hamburger buns? raisin I've ever seen is WAY bigger than that. Either way, I guess it means I can't quite blame my tummy pudge on the baby just yet.

I'm heading to the doctor this afternoon for the official blood test. Providing that comes back positive, this will all seem a lot more real. And if it doesn't....then setting up this blog was kind of waste of time, wasn't it?

BD is being super cute today. He called this morning to let me know that we can find out the baby's sex at 8 weeks. I told him that the genitals start forming then, but won't be visible for quite a while, then I asked him if he was on the internet. He said "I was earlier. I was looking at a week-by-week site. I had to stop at week 14; I got a little queasy." So precious. :) Then I got a text a little bit ago that said "I love you guys." Awww.....gross. It seems it's sinking in a bit more for him today.

I actually feel less pregnant today. My boobs don't hurt as bad and I'm not having any tummy issues or anything. I'm hopeful that I'll have one of those pregnancies without morning sickness. Have I mentioned I'm an optimist?

Sunday, March 15, 2009

Here goes nothin'

So, yeah. I'm pregnant. It is very, very strange to write those words, much less say them. When I say things like "my pregnancy", "my baby", and "no alcohol for 9 months", it sort of feels like I'm getting back into theatre, playing some far-fetched role that is nothing like my own life. But no, theatre this is not. This is my life. It does not feel real.

I suppose I should back up. (Maybe I should have done that a few weeks ago? Ha!)

A little over three weeks ago, BD (BabyDaddy) and I were less careful than we should have been, y'know, right in the middle of my cycle. About a week after that, my boobs started hurting, and I started feeling bloated and kind of cranky, and I thought, oh goody, PMS week has arrived. Yay! Only it lasted two weeks.

On Friday night (Friday the 13th!) BD and I decided to stop at the drugstore and pick up a home pregnancy test, you know, to put our minds at ease. We giggled about the two and three packs, but went for a two pack anyway. We picked up a birthday card that looked like a beer can for a friend. The cashier commented "I should get one of those for my nephew!" BD joked "Which one?", we all had a good laugh.

We got home. I peed on the stick. The Plus sign that means "you're pregnant" was evident immediately, even as I was still peeing on the thing. BD was all, wait the two minutes, maybe the plus sign will turn into a minus. I was skeptical, but waited the requisite two minutes. The plus sign did not magically turn into a minus.

We left to meet friends out for drinks. BD discreetly ordered me a diet 7up with a splash of cranberry juice. "Hold the vodka." The bartender looked at me funny. I swear she knew. A friend asked what I was drinking. I have no poker face what-so-ever, and I'm so conditioned not to lie that I just kind of froze and said "the usual", and avoided describing exactly what that was.

Despite my insistence that false positives pretty much don't happen, BD insisted I take the other test when we got home. This time, he watched me pee on the stick, and watched it turn immediately into a plus sign before his very own eyes.

According to Dr. Internet, I'm entering week 6, and I'm due in mid-November. I obviously need to go to a real doctor and confirm all of this, and make sure there's really a baby in there and whatnot. It's so weird. I'm already obsessed with googling things like co-sleepers, and whether my being a vegetarian is going to cause me to give birth to a carrot instead of a baby, and how long after I give birth must I wait before I get to have sex, and of course, witty maternity t-shirts that say things like "All I wanted was a backrub."

Planned or not, (the answer is "not", clearly), my nervousness is tinged with excitement, and a strange sense of calm. No, we were not planning on getting pregnant at this juncture, before our wedding, before I graduate, before we have health insurance. Still, I can't help but feel that it's all going to be alright, and that if there is a baby in there, and not a carrot, then now was the time for us to have a baby. After all, I will be 30 soon. I always did think 30 would be the perfect age to have a baby.